20/365 help

As a mom, do you ever realize just how messed up it is that Western society expects us to do alone what a literal entire village used to do together? 

Hospitals require you to be strapped on your back to a hospital bed to give birth in a position that does more to hinder your ability to push out a baby than to help. 

Other mothers expect you to listen to their unsolicited advice with gratitude even when it goes against how your unique gut instinct tells you to parent. 

Books tell you to let your baby cry themselves to sleep when your heart cries to comfort them. 

No one ever sat me down after having a baby, took my shoulders and said, ‘listen to your gut and shut out the noise. Don’t listen to everyone else and think your baby is broken when they don’t sleep independently or when they want to eat sooner than every three hours. Don’t feel bad for needing help when you can’t cook dinner, clean house AND take care of a child. It doesn’t make you weak. It makes you normal. It’s abnormal to be able to do everything by yourself and make time for self care and have the baby put down in your spotlessly clean house for a date evening with your spouse. If you can do all that by yourself you really are super woman but you shouldn’t have to be.’ 

If no one ever tells you that, consider this me telling you. 

You are a wonderful mother. You are doing the right thing for your baby. Ask for help and don’t feel bad when you need it. Don’t feel bad for wanting it. Because you can want help even if you don’t ‘need’ it. That’s okay.