26

 When I was probably 10, I used to count down the days till I was 13. Then I couldn't wait to be 16. I think most kids feel that way, don't they? By 16, I thought at everyone in their 20's had it all together, but I also thought every adult automatically had 20,000 dollars in their bank accounts for no other reason than it made sense. So that tells you how flawed my logic was, lol. 

I looked forward to being 25, but everything after that seemed too close to the looming slope that was 30. I was afraid that by 26 my personality would be drying up, and I would no longer be fun or interested in doing fun things, and all sense of adventure would be gone. I wasn't so much afraid of aging physically as I was aging out of relevancy...boy, wasn't I wrong? 

The truth is, I feel so much better about myself now than I ever have. I am more confident, I know how I like to dress and what I look good in, I know how to style my hair and do my makeup in a way that flatters my face. I know how to call and talk to the power company, the water company, the insurance agencies and hospitals. I know how to take care of a household, I know how to keep a baby alive. I make better judgement calls now than I did at 18 or 21, I'm wayyyy less gullible. I'm a more thorough planner. I'm better at looking at things with a critical eye and knowing that I can figure out how to do them and that knowledge is not off limits to me and the things I think are hard to do actually aren't really,  I've acquired all the skills I wish I had when I was 18. I remember longing to be more mature but not knowing how to do that, or how to stand up for myself. I can do all those things without thinking now, because of age and experience and also therapy.

I feel now like I am simply ready for every age without fear of losing myself. I know now that I'll grow into an even more experienced, hopefully wiser human being and age has nothing to do with what I do or don't do. (having a baby that requires an early bedtime has dictated my fun, nightlife, after party attending-ness more than age, ahaha) All in all, I've learned now to not be weary of growing up. It has more positive perks than negative. 

So here's to 26 and all it may bring. *clinks champagne glass*